Wedding Wednesday

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I love this quote. But I will tell you that is shocking how many people I know that have had affairs. People that were the last people I would ever think would have affairs. Godly men. Godly women. People I admired and looked up to. It makes me realize it can happen to anyone. Really. And that is just plain scary stuff.

**Disclaimer: I'm not an expert and I do not claim to be. These are just my thoughts and my opinions based on my experience and research on the subject.**

I think I have mentioned on here before that Garth and I have pretty strict boundaries. For example, we do not ride in a car or eat a meal alone with a member of the opposite sex. Why? Because the Bible says to flee from temptation:

"Abstain from every form of evil." 1 Thessalonians 5:22 ESV

"Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” Genesis 3:1-24 ESV

"Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God,” for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death." James 1:13-15 ESV

"Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." James 4:7 ESV

"Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy," Jude 1:24 ESV

"To the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen." Jude 1:25 ESV

"Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body." 1 Corinthians 6:18 ESV

"No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV

"So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart." 2 Timothy 2:22 ESV

Maybe you are thinking: "Having lunch or riding in a car with someone is NOT temptation." But most affair stories I have ever heard began with riding together in a car or eating a meal together. The parties never went into this thinking they were going to have an affair. But the more time they spent together one-on-one the stronger emotional bond they created.

Garth explains it this way: If you spent one-on-one time with a person of the opposite sex and enjoyed their company and kept seeing him or her more and more you would get to know each other deeper and deeper, right? Like any friendship, you start talking about surface topics, but as you get to know the person you start sharing more personal things about yourself and vice versa. If you continued to do this with this person you are getting your needs met emotionally. So why would you come home and talk to your spouse? You already talked it out with another person. Slowly and gradually your bond with your spouse would disappear and your bond to him would grow deeper. And one thing leads to another...

For example, if you eat a little ice cream here and there throughout your day when you get home the last thing you would want is ice cream. If you save all your ice-cream cravings for when you get home, it will be completely satisfying in every way. Does that make sense?

All that to say, Garth and I make the decision to avoid the emotional bond so the physical bond with another person is never even an option. Fleeing the temptation before it can even become a temptation. I would encourage you to discuss boundaries with your spouse and decide what you feel comfortable with. We must protect our marriages.

We must affair proof our marriage. Dress up for your man. Enourage him. Love him. Respect him. Go on date nights. Do little things to show you are thinking of him. Hold his hand. Hug him. Kiss him good night. Kiss him good morning. Let him lead your family. Pray for him. Serve him. Affirm him. Touch him. Be his biggest fan.